Rarely has a numeric rating felt so insufficient in capturing the totality of my opinion towards a film than what you see below.
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Watchmen (2009)
The Dancing Pig is a goofy little early film capturing a vaudeville-type stage dance — except one of the dancers is in an elaborate pig costume. I’m not enough of an early cinema history buff to declare this best costume ever filmed up to this point, but it’s gotta be up there — especially the cursed-looking teeth and tongue.
I’m fairly tolerant of the Chris Columbus outings, but watching Prisoner of Azkaban right on the tails of the first two films is like wandering the desert and then having a big glass of water.
I ended up watching this movie twice in short succession to prep for a podcast recording. This turned out to be the right choice as it effectively doubled my appreciation for the film; every visual pattern, every subtle cue of dialogue, every delicate and luscious composition comes in sharper relief once you know exactly what to look for. And it does so without compromising the elliptical, sensuous storytelling texture of the film.
The Emperor’s New Groove is one of those pieces of media that I’ve heard labelled “underrated” and “secretly great” so often that, well, it’s neither of those things. We as a culture (at least the millennials I know) collectively seem to remember this movie more fondly than just about any other Disney film.
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Steamboat Willie (1928)
It’s amazing to me that such an early example of sync-sound cartoon did it so well. The character animation is so energetic, curves bending and colliding and creating larger-than-life entities at cartoonish proportions. And all of that visual energy perfectly matches the sounds so that there’s never any doubt in the viewer’s mind that the action we’re seeing triggers the exact sound we’re hearing.
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Serie Noire (1979)
Serie Noire is a bizarre French neo-noir of a man’s life flying off the rails when he connects with a teenaged prostitute.
Chamber of Secrets is both my least favorite book to reread and my least favorite movie to rewatch.
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We Can Be Heroes (2020)
We Can Be Heroes, the Robert Rodriguez return to family entertainment, is not quite good, but it is far more competent and watchable than I feared, especially given the car crash that was the Spy Kids reboot.
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Machete Kills (2013)
I did not watch Machete and think “that movie left a lot on the table.”